It’s Valentine’s Day, to be honest not a celebration that I have ever really approved of. I see it as yet another commercial venture to encourage us to buy and consume more – especially chocolate. I struggle with it a lot because it seems to me that the love we celebrate on this day is the very antithesis of the love of God. It started out as a religious celebration commemorating the life of St Valentine, one of the early Christian martyrs but today is more a celebration of romantic, erotic love and another opportunity for the consumer culture to have us all out there buying lots of chocolates, roses and other gifts that we don’t really need. I was overwhelmed as I walked through the supermarket yesterday by the array of red flowers, red chocolate boxes and red cup cakes that were strategically placed to jump out at me as I entered the store. This is not what love is about.
The bible tells us God is love and Jesus tells us to love the Lord our God with all our hearts and souls and minds and love our neighbours as ourselves. This is a very different love from that touted on Valentine’s day.
I struggle because most chocolate is not ethically produced and there is no way we can love our neighbours, those who produce chocolate, when their lives are lived in misery. An article in Huffington post states:
According to an investigative report by the BBC, hundreds of thousands of children are being purchased from their parents or outright stolen and then shipped to Ivory Coast, where they are enslaved on cocoa farms. Destitute parents in these poverty-stricken lands sell their children to traffickers believing that they will find honest work in Ivory Coast and send some of their earnings home. The terrible reality is that these children, 11-to-16-years-old but sometimes younger, are forced to do hard manual labor 80 to 100 hours a week. They are paid nothing, receive no education, are under fed, and are often viciously beaten if they try to escape. Most will never see their families again.
But chocolate is good for us and it is easy to ignore its dark underside, especially on a day like this. And love is good for us. My husband Tom sees this as a day to affirm his love for me and for others, something that I always deeply appreciate. And God is a God of love. Affirming love for God, for each other and for God’s world are extremely important, but that means being concerned for those who live in misery so that we can enjoy cheap chocolates today.
So what do we do about it? Here are some suggestions:
- Start the day by reading Paul’s wonderful description of love in 1 Corinthians 13. Read it in a few different versions (available at Biblegateway.com)
- Read some of the wonderful love poems of Christian saints. My favourite is Fall in Love by Father Pedro Arrupe. I also love this reflection on How to Love God by Mother Teresa
- Be generous with your love. The New American Dream suggests rebooting Valentine’s Day as Generosity Day, seeing it not as a day to receive gifts of love but to give them. They suggest saying “yes” every time you are asked for a donation, a handout or a request. Give a $5 tip for a $2 cup of coffee. Bring in lunch for your co-workers. Certainly something to consider.
- Be generous with your gratitude. I think this is also a good day to show gratitude to those who love you and whom you love. Make phone calls to friends you have not spoken to for a while. Tell them how much you appreciate them.
- Purchase only ethically produced gifts and chocolates. Are you supporting conflict chocolate…yes, conflict chocolate, like conflict diamonds but with more caffeine.? How to Buy a Conflict Free Valentine’s Gift, gives some good suggestions on how to make more informed choices. There are many fair traded chocolate companies out there that we can support, and many of them are small locally owned companies, like Theo chocolates here in Seattle that we visited on Valentine’s day several years ago.
- Reach out to those who produce your chocolate and other favourite Valentine’s gifts. Watch The Dark Side of Chocolate with a group of friends and consider ways to make a difference in the lives of those who suffer for our indulgences.
Let me know what you plan to do this Valentine’s day in the spirit of the love of God?
Discern together – Supper at Emmaus by Roy de Maistre
I am in a very busy season of life, feeling I am juggling an ever increasing load of work, seeking ways to maximize my productivity and increase my efficiency all the time.
As I pondered my “efficiency” over these weeks I was reminded of a book I read several years ago by Ruby Payne entitled A Framework for Understanding Poverty. In the book she talks about something most of us rarely think about – what people give up in order to move from poverty to the middle class or from the middle class to wealth. The major thing that people need to be willing to give up is relationships. Specifically she feels that to move from poverty to the middle class we need to be willing to give up relationships for efficiency.
Its true, the busier we get – and our middle class lifestyles are extremely busy, the less time we have for meaningful relationships. Our relationships to our families and to our friends and to God can suffer severely and our relationships to God’s worldwide community is often not even on the screen. We stop eating meals together, schedule our summers with programs rather than family outings, and sit in front of screens rather than people. No wonder family breakups are common and our indifference to the suffer of others is epidemic.
This was all brought home to me this morning as I reread Compassion: A Reflection on the Christian Life, by Henri Nowen, Donald MacNeill, and Douglas Morrison.
“Discipleship is walking together on the same path. While still living wholly in the world, we have discovered each other as fellow travellers on the same path and have formed a new community…. We have become a new people with a new mind, a new way of seeing and hearing, and a new hope because of our common fellowship with Christ.”
We cannot walk together unless we are willing to take time for each other and that might mean being willing to give up some of our efficiency and productivity for relationships. In order to be good followers of Christ I think we need to revisit our values and the principles that under gird our lives.
Supper At Emmaus by He Qi
After Jesus resurrection he appeared to his disciples on several occasions. The thing that intrigues me is the intimacy and seeming inefficiency of these appearances. He wastes a whole day walking with 2 disciples on the road to Emmaus, he relaxes on the beach in Galilee making breakfast for his friends and he takes time to calm the fears and anxieties of those who afraid. Not what we would expect of someone whose great sacrifice had just brought salvation to the world. Maybe all of us would be more effective followers of Christ if we focussed less on accomplishing tasks and more on developing and nurturing relationships. What do you think?
Evening Prayer for Lenten Season
Let us seek the living God whose love is close at hand,
Let us pray to the One who waits patiently to be found.
May we abandon our dishonest ways,
And give up our unrighteous thoughts.
Let us come back to God with repentant hearts,
Let us come fasting and weeping, sorry for your sins.
God is merciful and kind to those who return,
God’s love is extravagant and forgiving to all who come near.
Let us change our lives and not our clothes,
Let us come back to the God who never leaves us.
Though our sins are like scarlet wounds,
They will be washed away and become white as snow.
(Pause to remind yourself of the places in which you have experienced God’s forgiveness and redemptive love)
Have mercy on us, O God,
Because of your unfailing love.
Because of your great compassion,
Blot out the sins that stain us.
Wash us clean from our guilt,
And purify our hearts from our sin.
Renew our inner spirit to become steadfast and unswerving,
So that we will be willing to obey you.
Do not turn us away from your loving presence O God,
Restore the joy of your salvation within us.
The sacrifice you desire is a penitent spirit,
You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God
Read evening psalms for the day from the Daily Lectionary.
God may we reach within this night,
To the hidden places of our souls.
May we uncover the sins that bind us.
May we reach without this night,
Into the brokenness of our world.
May we expose our indifference to its cries.
May we reach down this night,
Into the pollution of creation.
May we admit to our part in its contamination.
God may we reach upward this night,
Into your forgiving embrace.
May we find the joy of eternal life.
Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For the kingdom, the power and the glory are yours. Now and forever. Amen.
(Pause to offer up your own prayers and intercessions)
Lord we have denied you,
Each time we refused to see you in the faces of the hungry and the homeless.
May the old in us pass away and all things become new.
Lord we have betrayed you ,
Each time we have kept our distance from the anguish of the oppressed and the persecuted.
May the old in us pass away and all things become new.
Lord we have mocked you,
Each time we have pretended we do not know how radically you call us to live.
May the old in us pass away and all things become new.
Lord we are lost and have strayed,
Reconcile us to your image and make us new.
May the old in us pass away and all things become new.
All merciful One, God of infinite love and compassion, though we have strayed you have never abandoned us. In this season of repentance we come confessing our sins and reaching out for the healing power of your forgiveness. Through Christ our Lord, give us renewed and truthful hearts that will follow you in all of our ways.
Righteous God,
Compassionate and generous one
Who forgives our sins and has mercy on us
Fill our hidden places with your healing light,
Breathe on us afresh this night and grant us rest.
May your compassion bloom in us
May your righteousness bear fruit
May your generosity encourage us to share
May your love grow strong and deep within us
Breathe on us afresh this night and grant us rest.
Amen
Lenten wreath from http://www.weelittlemiracles.com/2011/03/idea-for-your-family-this-lent.html
As Lent begins I thought that some of you would appreciate this litany which I wrote a few years ago for Lent. Tomorrow I will post the evening litany as well.
Morning Prayer for Lent – A Litany of Repentance
God, all-loving and all-caring,
We come before you with hesitant steps and uncertain motives,
Our hearts are parched from wandering in a desert of sin.
We want to sweep out the corners where sin has accumulated,
And uncover the places where we have strayed from your truth,
Our hearts are parched from wandering in a desert of sin.
We ask for courage to open our eyes and unstop our ears,
That we may be aware of all that distracts us from a whole-hearted commitment to Christ,
Our hearts are parched from wandering in a desert of sin.
We want to see ourselves as you do and live our lives as you intended,
Expose in us the empty and barren places where we have not allowed you to enter,
Our hearts are parched from wandering in a desert of sin.
Reveal to us our half-hearted struggles,
Where we have been indifferent to the pain and suffering of others,
Our hearts are parched from wandering in a desert of sin.
Create in us a clean heart, O God, and put a right Spirit within us,
Nurture the faint stirrings of new life where your spirit has taken root and begun to grow,
Our hearts are parched from wandering in a desert of sin.
We long for your healing light to transform us into the image of your Son,
For you alone can bring new life and make us whole,
In your mercy, shine upon us, O God, and make our path clear before us.
Pause to remind yourself of your own brokenness and need for repentance
God of mercy, come,
Into the hidden places of our hearts,
Forgive our sins and make us whole.
Christ of compassion, come,
Into the broken places of our world,
Bring us to repentance and renew us.
Spirit of life, come,
Into the polluted places of our lives,
Have mercy on us and draw us close.
Son of the living God, Christ crucified
Forgive us, heal us, redeem us,
Lead us from death to eternal life.
Read scriptures for the Day from Daily Lectionary
Pause to reflect on the scriptures to think about those things that vie for your attention and distract you from a whole-hearted commitment to Christ.
Things that clutter and consume,
We lay them down.
Attitudes that separate and divide,
We lay them down.
Thoughts that confuse and disrupt,
We lay them down.
Into the cycle of living and dying and rising again,
We lay them down.
Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For the kingdom, the power and the glory are yours. Now and forever. Amen.
(Pause to offer up your own prayers of intercession)
God, you are good and upright, and you instruct sinners in your ways,
Show us how to break down the barriers separating us from each other,
Lead us through the wilderness sin has created to find new life.
Forgive us for the times we have abandoned the poor, the disabled, and the homeless,
Teach us to live by the law of love in unity, peace, and harmony.
Lead us through the wilderness sin has created to find new life.
Forgive us for the ways we exclude people of different race, culture, or gender,
Guide us that we may come to mutual understanding and care.
Lead us through the wilderness sin has created to find new life.
Draw us into your community to embrace those with whom we need to be reconciled,
Grant that all who seek to heal divisions between peoples may have hope.
Lead us through the wilderness sin has created to find new life.
Show us your ways, O Lord,
Teach us your paths and guide us towards your truth.
Lead us through the wilderness sin has created to find new life.
Pause to offer your own prayers of repentance and forgiveness
Go into the day knowing your life has been touched by the triune God.
Let the God of creation breathe on you,
Let the God of life sustain you,
Let the God of all Gods grant you forgiveness.
We are cleansed by the mercy of God,
We are surrounded by the love of Christ,
We are filled with the power of the Spirit.
Amen.
In Bread for the Journey: A Daybook of Wisdom and Faith, Henri Nouwen says:
Discipline in the spiritual life is the concentrated effort to create the space and time where God can become our master and where we can respond to God’s guidance. Thus, discipline is the creation of boundaries that keep time and space open for God – a time and place where God’s gracious presence can be acknowledged and responded to.
Discipline has almost become a dirty word in our society. Boundaries and limits make us feel as though we can’t breathe or that we have lost our freedom.
I well remember a friend of ours who spent several weeks in a monastery. He told me that before he went he thought that having to stop for prayer several times a day would be stifling. Instead he found it to be liberating. It took my focus away from work as the most important thing to God, he told me.
How often is our lack of discipline because our eyes are on something other than God?How often do we lack discipline because we want the freedom to do anything we like without being accountable to God or to anyone else around us?
Think about what Nouwen says. Rather than emphacizing the rigours of repetitive action that many of us struggle he focuses on the result – time & space for God. What spiritual disciplines have you avoided with the excuse that they are repetitive or ritualistic and yet in the process lost time and space with God? What is one discipline you could initiate that would help create necessary boundaries to protect your time with God?
In Eager to Love, Richard Rohr comments that St Francis of Assisi asked us to stay close to the cracks in the social fabric of our world. It is a thought worth reflecting on.
Everything in our lives and in our world has cracks, wounds and broken places that tell of pain and suffering. Sometimes we try to cover them over, attempting to seal them off from the light. But this only makes them fester and get worse.
Yet it is in the cracks, the broken places of our lives, where violence flares and pain cries out that healing happens. When we acknowledge imperfections, we take the first step towards wholeness. It is into the cracks that light can shine and water can seep. It is in the cracks in the concrete that seeds can lodge, germinate and take root. And as green shoots reach for the sky, the crack enlarges, the concrete crumbles and what was meant to live and breathe thrives once more.
What is your response?
Sit quietly in the presence of God, allowing the love of God to wash over you. Read through the prayer above several times. What cracks in your world, what places of woundedness and vulnerability that give you ongoing pain come to mind? In what ways have you tried to cover these over, perhaps with a facade of laughter or with a semblance of respectability? Are there ways you respond, perhaps with fear, or anger or intolerance that show these are festering? Perhaps there are things you need to confess or seek forgiveness for. Offer these up to God in prayer.
Now think of the light that has shone into those cracks. What has it begun to give life too? Are you aware of green shoots emerging towards the sun? How could you nurture their growth and make help them to thrive?
At our local mall recently I noticed that what was once a solid concrete slab of parking slots has now been transformed. Deliberate “cracks” have been added between the rows of cars – small gardens that channel the water into the topsoil and down into the water table are thriving. The rain no longer creates a flood of water that overflows the drains and clogs the waterways.
Sometimes when we stay close to the cracks we realize that they need to be nurtured and strengthened to rebuild the fabric of our lives and our society. And as we nurture these it is not only the surface life that thrives but it is the deep wellsprings of the water table that flourishes too.
What is your response?
Read through the prayer above again. What slabs of pavement are you aware of in your life and society that need to be broken up with gardens? Is there something the spirit of God is prompting you to do that could help accomplish this?
Now listen to the song below and allow the spirit of God to stir your imagination. Is there another response God is asking of you?
At Mustard Seed Associates we have many exciting resources available to celebrate the season:
“Stop Playing Games:
Return to Our Senses in Lent”
Pre-Lent Retreat
When: February 14th, 2015
Where: Union Church Kakao Cafe
415 Westlake Ave N
Seattle, WA 98109
There is still time to sign up for the retreat! Find out more HERE
Join in God’s Reconciling Work
- A Journey into Wholeness: This devotional contains a rich array of reflections and activities to enable us to draw close to God and God’s purposes at this season.
- Lenten prayer cards also make a great focus for daily reflections.
- 40+ Ideas for Lent and Easter: Free Lenten activity guide
- “Stop Playing Games: Join God’s Reconciling Work For Lent“ is the featured Lenten series on the Godspace Blog.
- Updated resource lists on Godspace:
These Lenten resource lists have been shared widely, being featured amongst other rich resources by sites such as Textweek.com, Lent and Beyond, and by bloggers like Rachel Held Evans.
Stir Your Imagination for Lent
If you want to use your own creativity to imagine new possibilities for the season, check out:
- Five Ways to Foster Creativity in Kids
- Seven Tips for Creating Sacred Space in Lent
- Get Creative and Play Games for Lent
Join with us in getting ready for the Lenten season and be prepared to be drawn into God’s reconciling work!
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