By Louise Conner —
The avalanche lily lifts its yellow face
careless of the coming winter
when ice will bury it beneath its burden
stripping it all the way to roots.
Petals uncurl toward this day’s sun, offering
nectar to whatever happens by.
It does not hoard or hide
but calls with scent and color
taste and see, taste and see.
If winter comes,
when winter comes, grief
will turn blossoms earthward
dampen them to brown decay,
but in the short alpine season
the lily offers all the gifts it has
here, amidst the granite,
on this bright September day.
When I think of walls, I think of protection, ways we keep our self or others safe from harm. To go outside those walls, to allow others inside those walls, to eventually even remove the walls, requires a willingness to be vulnerable.
I wrote the poem, “Anticipating Grief,” when my sister was beginning cancer treatment. I recognized then that much of my worrying was an unconscious way of anticipating grief, “preparing” myself in advance for hard things, so that if they came, I would be braced, and, perhaps, since I was ready for them, they wouldn’t hurt as much. I used anticipatory grief as if it were a barrier to actual grief. If I worried that my kids would fail, perhaps it wouldn’t hurt as much if they did. If I worried that an interaction would go poorly, then I had an emotional shield already up if that is what happened. I worried as if that anticipatory grief would somehow lessen the actual grief if and when it came.
I think there are a couple problems with this–it doesn’t work as we hope it might and it isn’t how God wants us to live.
If we worry all the time, we tend to be more cautious, which does save us from some circumstances that could cause grief. If we never make a friend, we save ourselves from the grief of betrayal. But we also remove the possibility of joy, companionship and shared life. When we protect ourselves physically, emotionally, materially, or psychologically with walls of worry and distrust, we remove ourselves from completely living; we are only partially living.
I also don’t think it’s how God wants us to live. When Jesus urged his disciples to, “Consider the lilies of the field…”, he points to a way of life that doesn’t anticipate grief, but lives fully in the day at hand. When we walk outside of our safe walls, when we allow God and others inside our safe walls, when we live wholeheartedly, holding nothing back, we take a chance. It is risky. By caring deeply and living wholly, a sorrow or betrayal might come unexpectedly and deeply hurt us; God might take away something that we don’t want taken away.
But, when walls come down–within ourselves, between us and God, between us and creation, between us and other people, it opens up passageways for the breath of God to blow through, and the breath of God brings amazing and beautiful things into being. When we let go of what we clutch for safety, we become able to honestly look at what is inside of us and inside of others. And, when, like the avalanche lily in the poem, we do “not hoard or hide” and “offer all the gifts” we have, we will be able to experience the joy of seeing whatever gifts we have to offer being used by God to help others and to accept the gifts others offer us. We can experience a life open to the leading of God, grateful for our place in the creation we are part of, and able to enjoy shared life together in community. Grief will no doubt come, but so will life, abundantly.
Louise Conner is new to the Godspace writers community. She lives in the Pacific Northwest, where her days are filled with things she cares about–her church, family, friends, words, walks, sunrises, dirt, laughter, and opportunities to experience and join in God’s work in the world. She serves as a Board Member of Circlewood, a ministry of Mustard Seed Associates and yearns for the people of God to treasure and love this complex and beautiful world that God has created.
There was an old low wall, all around the first garden I ever grew all
for myself. Up against it I planted hollyhocks, and billowy old roses
that didn’t care a bit about boundary markers. Within a season they
had thrown wild long limbs out into the unsuspecting world, blooming
with abandon for anyone and everyone who wandered by.
I tucked mint, and strawberries in around the feet of antique roses,
and daisies and within what seemed like an eye blink they had wandered
their stubborn way across the yard, and through the walls between
flower beds. Fragrant mint and sweet red berries sprang up everywhere
outside my plan.
Photo taken by Rev. Josephine Robertson on a trip to New England.
No one told the weeds about walls; and most perennials simply don’t
listen. What is a bit of stone and mortar to a strawberry runner, or
the fluffy thistledown with a good breeze behind her? We humans love
walls, neat and tidy and safe. I suspect our Creator humors us, but
She also gives us strawberries, and creeping Charlie, and mint to
remind us that walls are meant to be breached.
Some days I am a weed. Jumping the walls, ignoring the fences, blowing
straight through the safe well laid plans because the Spirit is
moving. There is a time for walls, for cages that keep the rabbits at
bay until a tree has grown big enough to fend for itself. But the same
walls that keep the world out, fence us in.
I suppose that Eden had a wall, a sort of playpen for our infant
species, safe and contained. But children grow up (when all is as it
should be), and leave nurseries and safety behind for a great wide
world beyond. If you leave the protective cage around the growing tree
too long it will do exactly what you sought to prevent. It will girdle
the trunk, kill it even.
All the safe walls in which we operate, the children’s picture Bible I
so adored, the few square blocks around my home, will eventually
smother us. We must move past the colorful pictures, and simple Aesop
fable meanings, or the Bible itself becomes a wall between us and the
One who made us. Take your cue from mint, tenacious and bold. Follow
the strawberries, reaching out beyond walls for new fertile ground.
Remember the roses, refusing to just bloom inside where only a few can
see.
The key of course, the thing we must practice our whole lives is the
discernment to know when a wall is protection and help, and when we
have outgrown its bounds. Walls after all usually have doors, and we
are not meant to stay inside them forever. Jesus stands outside and
knocks.
On Friday, my first copies of The Gift of Wonder arrived on our doorstep – well in advance of the March 19th launch party. As you can imagine I am very excited about this and it seems that many of you are too. Unfortunately some of you are wondering what on earth this book is all about so we have just added a list of the chapter headings to the Gift of Wonder page to give you an idea of what I talk about in the book.
Just a couple of other reminders as the launch date approaches
Don’t Forget The Launch Party
If you live in Seattle don’t forget to RSVP for the launch party March 19th so that we can have plenty of food, wine and fun activities to share with you – as well as books and the special prayer cards that are available only at my speaking events or through the Godspace website. It will be a fun evening and the Shafer Baille mansion where we are holding it is spectacular. Your RSVP will mean you know how to get there and where to park.
Still Time to Pre-Order Your Book
Don’t forget to pre-order your book there are only a few more days to do that. If you want to get it along with the prayer cards this special deal is only available through Godspace, and I can even sign the book for you if you like. Check out the Gift of Wonder page for all the options and for the endorsements and chapter headings that hopefully will help you make up your mind!
Join Me In Austin Texas or at Inhabit.
I am really looking forward to my first speaking opportunity at the New Story Festival in Austin Texas in a couple of week.s There is still time to sign up for this exciting event and don’t forget to use my special code NSF1187. You will get a $20 discount and I will get a contribution toward my travel expenses.
I will also conduct a seminar at the Inhabit Conference here in Seattle April 26 & 27. Tom and I enjoy this conference every year and I highly recommend it to all of you.
by Christine Sine
“Pray and wield a mighty pen” These words from the introduction to Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s Lenten devotional God On the Cross have held my attention this week as I prepared myself to enter Lent. What does this have to do with my theme Breaking Down Walls you may ask? From my perspective quite a lot. As I prayed this week and asked God about what walls I needed to break down, the word “guilt” was impressed on me — specifically guilt that tells me I don’t measure up to what God wants of me, guilt that says I should be out there doing more to help the poor, to relieve suffering and to heal the sick rather than writing about it.
Educated Into Freedom
God’s People first came into existence when the children of Israel were delivered from slavery in Egypt and called out into the desert to be educated in freedom, to learn how to live with no other master but God himself.”
These words of Thomas Merton, are something of a mantra for me as I enter Lent each year. They came back to me as I smashed my first wall in my Lenten garden and spread the fragment round my plants today. You need to be freed from guilt this Lenten, guilt that tells you to be someone you are not and to do something I have not called you to do in this season of life.
Is this a freedom that God is prompting you too to enter into during Lent? Is God asking you to let go of the slavery of trying to be someone you are not called to be in this season of life? Where does your freedom lie?
first wall broken down
Breaking Down Walls
The first wall God often asks us to break down is the wall behind which we have hidden the image of God within us. For me that image has revolved around a misconception of who God has called me to be in this season of life. When I allow guilt to creep in I not only distort that image, I belittle the wonder of who my creator God is and wisdom with which God has created me.
Pray And Wield a Mighty Pen.
Gift of Wonder arrives
Wield it in words – I don’t think it is by accident that these words came to me only hours before my copies of The Gift of Wonder were delivered to my door. This is the fruit of my pen over the last year. It has already brought change into my life and into the lives of some of my launch team who are already reading and talking about it. I am humbled as I sit before God and ponder this. “Your words, when anointed by the Holy Spirit, encourage and strengthen others. They enable others to express their gifts more freely and so become the people God intends them to be.” Wow – how easily I could have continued to hide behind my wall of guilt and not been liberated into the freedom of recognizing how God is working in my life. and there is more…
Wield it in poetry – My pen does’t just write, it creates – firstly poetry which started coming to me about 10 years ago. Like so many others, I increasing find expression in poetic words. It liberates my soul and sets my imagination free. It encourages me to dream new dreams and express praise and worship in new and joyful ways. It delights me and I think it delights the heart of God too.
Wield it in imagery. When I become busy or when I wallow in guilt, I stop painting rocks and doing calligraphy. The designs, shapes and colours that give me joy and delight the heart of God are bound once more into slavery. Today I have broken down that wall and am once more free to pull out my paint pens and my water colours. I am unleashing the creativity that is part of the image of God within me and I know that it will find freedom in fresh expressions and insights that come from the heart of God.
Find the freedom of using your gifts for strengthening, for healing, for empowering I sense God is saying to me, perhaps our Holy God is saying the same to you. I am not sure what that will look like in the future for me or for you, but as I walk this journey of Lent with God’s spirit as my guide, I am sure that I will find out. I hope you will too.
What practices have you let go of that have sent you back into the bonds of slavery? How is God prompting you to break those bonds and find the freedom of following God alone?
As we move into the first full week of Lent I encourage you to take time to ask God what walls need to be broken down in your innermost being. How can you be liberated into freedom and find the joy of once more following God alone?
March is Women’s History Month, a wonderful time to honour some of the women of history who have shaped and formed us. I have always found inspiration from the lives of those who have gone before. Their footprints provide places for me to stand and words and prayers encourage and strengthen me as I too seek to move forward into the ways of God. It seems appropriate that we celebrate the lives of some of these women during this season of Lent.
Teresa of Avila by Peter Paul Rubens
Teresa of Avila is one such person. In her classic The Interior Castle she says: “Let nothing disturb you. Let nothing frighten you. All things pass. God does not change. Patience achieves everything.” I have decided to add this book to my Lenten reading as I guiltily realized yesterday that there are presently no women on my list and yet much of my inspiration comes from women.
In many ways Teresa of Avila was a very ordinary person – struggling with some of the same life challenges we struggle with today. But out of that struggle came a rich inner prayer life that continues to inspire many today.
Here is one of my favourites of her prayer/poems. Read it through several times. Listen to the beautiful musical rendition at the end of the post. Allow their truths to take root in your heart. I prayed this prayer several times this morning as I considered the plight of the 12 million people whose lives are at risk in the Horn of Africa because of drought. As you read this prayer and listen to the music may you too consider what action God may ask of you as a result of reading and meditating on them
“Christ has no body now, but yours.
No hands, no feet on earth, but yours.
Yours are the eyes through which
Christ looks compassion into the world.
Yours are the feet
with which Christ walks to do good.
Yours are the hands
with which Christ blesses the world.”
Music by David Ogden
by Lilly Lewin
This week we started our Lenten practice at thinplaceNASHVILLE, with a Shrove Tuesday pancake dinner at a local cafe. Shrove Tuesday, or Pancake Tuesday is the day before Lent actually begins. It’s a day to clean out all the fat, and sugar, etc from the pantry and prepare for the Lenten fast.
At the cafe, I created a centerpiece on the table that included all the ingredients for making pancakes from scratch, and included a box of instant mix too. I had the prayer printed out so everyone could follow along. Our group is pretty introverted, so we didn’t pray, or even read it aloud together as we would do if we were at our usual spot. Instead, I allowed everyone to read it on their own while we waited for our orders. We spent some time catching up on our days and talked about what some our Lenten practices might be and closed our meal with a communal blueberry pancake.
If you have never celebrated Shrove Tuesday, or Pancake Tuesday. It’s not too late to start. Why not make pancakes for breakfast or dinner this weekend and use the Pancake Prayer Reflection below to help you start your Lenten practice. You can go out to eat if you don’t want to cook! Take time to consider the questions and ponder the ingredients. You might even take time to journal the questions. If you are doing this with a group of friends, or with your family, take time to share your thoughts and learn from one another.
I pray that we all will grow closer to Jesus, and experience more and more of his great love as we begin our Lenten journey. I’m posting more ideas for Lent on my Facebook page and on instagram @lillylewin so follow along!
PANCAKE PRAYER:
On this Shrove Tuesday, as we prepare for Lent, Consider the things that make up pancakes…Consider these Ingredients
Pick one that resonates with you.
What is God speaking to you about through the ingredients? What is God’s recipe for you this year for Lent? Ask Jesus to show you!
Flour
Sugar
Eggs
Baking Powder
Pinch of Salt
Butter or Oil
OR Pancake Mix
FLOUR… the staff of life
It its the main ingredient
It makes pancakes, breads, and cookies!
Add Baking Powder or Yeast and it Rises!
Flour comes in lots of forms:
Bleached
Whole Wheat
Gluten Free
Almond and Rice Flours
It also comes pre-sifted…
CONSIDER:
What does God want to mix up in your life this Lent?
What does Jesus want to make new?
What does God want to create, make, bake?
What does God want to sift into your life? Does your life need sifting? Or reheated?
SUGAR… the sweetness of life
adds sweetness
too much makes us fat
too much causes inflammation
there is real sugar and there is artificial sugar
things can be exchanged for it, like applesauce, honey, molasses CONSIDER:
What areas of your life need sweetening in a good way?
How can you bring sweetness to the world?
Pinch of Salt:
Are you felling salty or in need of salt today?
Are you bringing flavor to your world or just leaving a bitter taste in people’s lives?
EGGS:
they provide the protein
might cause an allergy attack
multiple ways to cook them outside of a recipe for pancakes
CONSIDER:
Are you feeling scrambled ? too busy? need focus?
Are you feeling allergic to life, to God, to people?
Are you feeling dried out and over cooked?
Talk to God about this!
BUTTER, OIL, FAT…
Gives life it’s richness, and makes Julia Child smile!
Butter makes everything taste better
CONSIDER:
How is God mixing you together this Lent?
What new ingredients does Jesus want to add?
Any substitutions need to be made?
Do you need to change out artificial for real ingredients?
What new dish or new menu does God want to show you between now and Easter?
What special meal does God want to create with you and for you?
RECEIVE THE LOVE
Imagine the Pancakes cooking on the griddle.
Perfect pancakes, light and airy, browned just right.
Picture them stacked on a plate,
Rich butter on the top.
Perhaps with blueberries or strawberries added in or on the top.
Perhaps filled with chocolate chips and topped with whipped cream!
The butter melts.
The syrup flows.
Imagine this to be a gift from Jesus to you!
Allow this image to represent the
The Richness and Abundance of God’s Love you…
The Richness and Abundance of Jesus’s Love for us today and always!
Let’s taste and receive this Love today and each day between now and Easter.
AMEN
©lillylewin freerangeworship.com 2019
NOTE: my original inspiration came from the AD for the Iona community shrove tuesday service. You can purchase the service here. If you don’t know the Iona community, they have great resources for prayer and liturgies too! I’ve had the amazing opportunity to stay with the community on the island of Iona, it’s one of my favorite places on the planet!
by Christine Sine
What are you reading for Lent this year? This is a question I am often asked at this time of year so I thought I would share my personal preferences as we enter a new season of Lent. I find that it easy for me to get bogged down in the feeling that I must save the world at this season, or at least save myself to be more effective in the world (hence that graphic above)
I must confess I have been a little overwhelmed by all the offerings out there this year too, which doesn’t help my focus. Sp I have decided to stick to old faithfuls. I suspect that some other reading will be added as I go but for the moment I have three devotionals that I plan to dig into at different times of the day or week. I have downloaded them all onto my kindle because I will be doing a lot of travel over the next month and having something reliable to read on the plane is something that I find creates stability and normalcy for me. So here is my list:
Walter Brueggemann: A Way Other Than Our Own
Dietrich Bonhoeffer: God Is On The Cross
Richard Rohr: Wondrous Encounters
And unless you think I am stuck in the mud, I am also reading Prayer: Forty Days of Practice by Justin McRoberts and Scott Erickson on the side – well worth reflecting on the artwork as well as the short practice.
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Yes I take this season very seriously. I try to spend time in silence and listening. Time reading and reflecting, time in creative expression (that’s where my Lenten garden comes in) and time journalling. In some ways it is a busy season but in others I find it relaxing and energizing.
What disciplines are you committing to during Lent this year?
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